Baba and Gido (a Shadorma)
Baba, Gid’
and thermostat wars
he too hot
she too cold
each June uncorked again this
rancid argument
Baba gone
Gid’ in nursing home
he don’t know
hot or cold
only knows she’s not there for
any argument.
© 2011 by Violet Nesdoly
****************
Baba and Gido are Ukrainian diminutives for Grandma and Grandpa.
Shadorma is a Spanish 6-line syllabic poem of 3/5/3/3/7/5 syllable lines respectively.
This poem is linked at One Shot Wednesday Week 49
i’ve never read a poem in this form before.. it’s very unique. loved the flow. great piece!
which makes him alone, which is far worse than the temperature…this made me smile even in the sorrow in how two people relate…
Winning petty arguments never matters in the grand scheme of things. Very sad ending to the relationship dynamic.
This is a f orm I have come to enjoy very much. The compression it requires while still allowing for emotion is appealing and can have wonderful effect.
I like how you’ve used it here. In very few words (and syllables) you’ve told us a story that gives us an emotional tug. Well-done!
Like Maureen, I’ve grown to love this poem and especially use it as a stanza in a longer work. You’ve captured the story of many in the tug of blankets, turns of the thermostat and the adjusting of the environment. It’s cold comfort when your partner has to leave however. Thanks. Gay
Thanks so much, everyone for dropping by and commenting. I like your idea, Hollyheir, to join it with a longer work. The Shadorma is lots of fun to write for sure, as Maureen will attest (she is real Shadorma master!).
Violet,
Reading Maureen’s and then your shadorma inspired me to try one over at my place…